Grow and Decay (re​-​release)

by SPEAKER

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1.
03:24
2.
03:10
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5.
04:10

about

Thank you for taking the time to listen to our songs.

credits

released March 1, 2016

Drums and bass rerecorded by Todd Barriage
Mixed and mastered by Todd Barriage at Borland Studio

Album art by Kurt Cuffy

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all rights reserved

about

SPEAKER Toronto, Ontario

A wild band from Toronto, Ontario.

Liam
Matt
Marc-Anthony
Adam

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Track Name: Refuse
We need to mend these broken jaws and open our ears to acceptance.

Carry the crippled bird. Release the free bird. Carry the crippled mind. Stand tall and watch it rise. Roots stunted growth. Potential lost in soil. Broken branches, torn leaves. Betrayal, jealousy, loss, greed.

Refuse to stand still. Set money on fire, create warmth for another. Extend a hand as you would for your mother. Lower your gun and drop your defences. Remove your mask and show your raw skin. Take off your clothes and expose every scar to an open mouth and open arms. Break the concrete and open the landfill. I need room because I refuse to stand still.

Not too many people got flowers on their tongues. Just a lot of fire mouths and jagged teeth.

Open our hearts and let them guide our actions. Open our eyes to the blind and wounded. Open our minds and see skin like hair. Open our arms and create a sense of home. Open our doors and feed the stray dog. Open our mouths. An open mouth for every sleepless night. An open mouth for any losing a fight. Open your mouth, listen, raise your head from shallow water.
Track Name: Baby Blues
Acne and A grades. Feelings fading - feelings faded. Looks like I'll be taking candy from babies.

Spitting barbed wire from plastic lips. Extinguish fires with a bottle of gin. Holding your breath until you tear your lungs. It ain't wrong to pull the cat from your tongue. Don't hold back.. Holding back the baby blues.

Shaking ankles instead of hands. Lunch money and rubber bands. Spitballs and dad's demands. Wishing I could just be shaking hands. Breaking bones to heal broken egos.

Shed your skin - soul exposed. X marked hands pulling multicoloured hair. Fists in the air without a goddamn care. I'm so sick of you and you and you.

Walking on eggshells. Stepping on shards of glass. Tiptoe footsteps - dodging all the thumbtacks.

Oh, pathetic son of mine, cauterize the wounds with salt and rubber. Undermine. Shut my eyes. I've propped them open.
Track Name: When the Son Doesn't Shine
This wine is my blood - drink it. I am the thirstiest vampire. Step on the cup while holding the bottle. Pour the contents on bills, ignite the fire.

Paralyze my body - move my limbs. Control leads to many mistakes. Grasping for the walls without the lights on. You see me through a black stained glass window pane.

Planted seeds in the garden. Never watered, only rain. Gardener's been away. Flowers in the sunshine.

A spoiled man in a lonely home brushing up dirt children from a filthy floor. Eyes looking up for a man that isn't there and a foot coming down scattering dust in the air. A man with children but not a father. Selling books with torn pages to the blind. Hands grazing paper, searching for braille. Answers I could never find. Not even in the highest of places. Limbs of trees sawn up and spat in faces. A man with dirt children but not a father.

Exhale glass winged butterflies. Red blurs float in front of my eyes. I'm sorry I'm not pumping oil from the ground or beneath my skin. I'm not your golden trophy ghost of the child in those pictures on the wall.

Indecisive. Liar. Pets in the toy box. Take absence. Waiting until the summertime. Proud - Pathetic. Cut the stitches from my mouth and vomit every word lodged in my stomach.
Track Name: Shallow Lungs
Gloves on, concealing frozen hands. A frozen body lacking warmth again. The early night, ridding sky of light. Like the naked trees - vulnerable mind. Week long days and year long nights. Stomach lost the fist fight.

I can't set fire to a single leaf without burning down the family tree. Wither and fall into autumn streets but I'm only an April tree.

Sweaty sheets. Grinding teeth. Heavy feet. This isn't me. Grey streets. Lacking sleep. Longing dreams. Surface relief.

Driving in the dark with no destination. Nothing but trees and no gas stations. Eyes shut tight and dodging pedestrians. Walking may have been the better choice.

Sunrise. Clear sky. Open eyes. I think I'm fine. Energized. Open mind. Bright light. Feel alive.

The sun rises and I see the city in the distance.
Track Name: Biting Nails
Popping pills and hitting the waves. Burning eyes and an LCD screen. Enemies with clarity. Best friends with nicotine.

Bed head and tired eyes. You've lost all track of time. Pull me from the quicksand. Firm grip on your sweaty hand.

Break the mirror and fix your glasses. Sandpaper skin will be removed. Shovel the dirt back in the hole. I won't remember to forget you. You need to know that you don't deserve this.

I know the world will continue to turn without your existence but without you breathing, I don't want a thing to do with it.

Counting sheep to thousands. Praying with sweaty hands. Tossing and turning. Laying in fiberglass. Release all your fears. Your words, like water seeping through the grass. Pulling me under a timeless hourglass. Release all your fears of living.

Well, maybe I can't find the words that will make you stay but at least keep in mind how much you mean to me. What I hope most for you is that you look in the mirror for a second or two and see that beautiful person that I do. See that beautiful person in front of you.